Monday, 26 December 2016

Hmmm future?

Hello masa depan? Di manakah anda akan membawa saya?

It's my final semester--- I need to plan out my future haha. I've been considering a part time job / full time at any ID Company near Shah Alam, or at Shah Alam itself. And degree, I want to continue ID. I'm really passionate about it, of course I love plenty of other things as well but id speaks to me like no other courses can. Archi pun interesting but I really like ID more. Industrial Design pun interesting weh. Hmm. Graphic pun, graphic pun!!!

But let's focus on my studies (degree) first. Danial kept talking about UIA (alah he wants me to be closer to him je :p) but I heard good stuff about UIA, even miss dila is doing her masters there and she speaks nicely of the department and im really interested, i really am. Epap kept talking about USM (penang; thats twice the distance from shah alam to perak) i dont know about the department (ID) bcs epap dalam archi so, it's diff. I need to find out more. Taaaaapi, the thought of Penang. The thought of me, studying in Penang... my god, tempting nya. Hahahaha! Okay ni fikir berjalan lebih ni. Tapi yelah, bila lagi? Kan?

On the other hand, my fav senior, who helped me a lot - Sam. Insist me on finding a scholarship out of Malaysia. Hmm. Pastilah nak, gila taknak? Sebab this is very general la, satu benda ni akan ubah banyak benda. One thing about studying in Malaysia, design berorientasikan cuaca panas je and hujan. But once u go out, akan belajar 4 season. And benda tu je, akan belajaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaar banyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaak sangaaaaaaaaaaat. Banyak yang perlu di-consider thus banyak yang akan belajar.

Kaaaahwin? Haaahaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ha ni kalau jadi ni mmg lain cerita dia ni. Hahahaha. Leklu, tunggu habis diploma ni dulu okay. Alah kawin time degree pun boleh apa. Boleh Danial buatkan model, pergi print kan board, kan? Hahahaha!!! Main main je. Main main je.

Saturday, 17 December 2016

Missing Bung Dar

Ego & Zero Consideration

Some people they just put others on mute. They refuse to listen, refuse to pay attention, refuse to see the case in a bigger picture, from different angles.

"Take em all, take em all, go ahead" then they sarcastically retreat and went moody all day long.

Some people will never agree with opinions other than theirs. How cruel is that, to live in this world, with various views and various people, but to only live in a harsh way; hurting others while you're riding it?

Cant fathom.

Diff issue - when A is a friendly person towards others, you wont be surprised if A is friendly with you. When A is a disciplined person, you won't be surprised if A showed up early. When A is a thoughtful person, its not weird to receive a hug from A on your bad day.

But when you constantly see A lying to other people, dont be surprised if A has told you 10 thousand lies.

Your priorities says a lot about you.
Theres always something new to learn everyday.

Thursday, 1 December 2016

This is important, I wanna remember this.

So, I've been trying to khatam my quran for 2 years now. Started when I entered uni. And now, after 2 years; akhirnya khatam. Alhamdulillah.

It took such a long time ya rabbi lamanya. Anyway. When I was in school, I read my quran without its translation so honestly with no understanding of the Arab language, how could i understand a thing. Theres no outcome. I felt no fear, i felt no peace. The water was still. Tidak deras tidak pula perlahan, kaku dia terdiam.

Then I decided to buy one with translation... urmmmm i dislike the design hahaha! I was like -_- pages dia rainbows and banyaKKKK bunga. But I like the content, the meaning is in malay and on the bottom of each page there's a story to be read. And it's for women. So the stories are much more relatable for women.

I read the quran slowly, i read its meaning, and then its ayat. meaning. ayat. meaning. ayat. one by one. because my mind suka meliar pergi jalan jalan they have their own destination at times. So thats the best for me. And I dont force myself to read as much as I can, i learn to read it slowly. it works for me, so, bagus la kan. Of course, there was ups and downs, ada hari tak tersentuh pun. Malunya? Haih tapi thats the truth.

I love the feeling I get; hope, there's always a promise for those who are beriman, syurga di mana bawahnya ada air yang mengalir; khas untuk yang beriman. How beautiful He describes everything. Its amazing, thru quran, He planted hope beautifully into my heart, besarnya kasih sayang Dia. I love the shiver and the fear i get from reading quran too. His promise of neraka for the ones who doesnt obey Him. I get legit scared at some of them. How he took away kaum yang tak mahu bersujud kepada dia sekelip mata, macam tu je... the way He describes the punishments yang tersedia di neraka.

Quran is the one and only book that made me shed my tears. Because sometimes I feel like Im such a sinner, i sinned so much, tapi when I know He forgives the one yang bertaubat, how could i not cry? How could i not cry over His mercy.

I have plans for later, I wanna learn Quran better. Just berharap sangat this feeling wont fade away, because I'll never know what i'll be like later in life- ada kemungkinan hati berpaling, iman merudum makin berkurang. Moga agar tetap dilembutkan hati sampai hari aku mati. Moga sentiasa terbuka hati terima kesilapan sendiri, selalu memperbaiki diri, tak pernah bongkak tak pernah riak. Amin.

note to self: u wrote this around 8pm
motif: so that u'll remember what it felt like, how bittersweet the last few surah was for u, and the last one- surah Al-Nas especially.

Thank u Allah for this chance.