Days like this; i became a sponge.
I soaked all of the (bad) things people told me, and most importantly what i tell myself. I let others define me and im starting to believe that its true.
Maybe I am a hypocrite
Maybe I am a selfish person
Maybe I am an attention seeker
Maybe I am all of the above, all at once.
I'm slowly forgetting that the world is kind, that Allah is fair.
I'm slowly forgetting that there are people who genuinely care, i forgot that there are people who actually love me.
Days like this i just want to smack my head with a glass bottle. I just wanna rip my skin and become this; brand new- beautiful and perfect living thing. I want to be solid white once again, i want to rub off all of my dirt, flatten my ugly bumps, straighten my winding road.
Days like this, i just feel that im not enough for anyone and i dont deserve anyone.
Days like this doesnt come often but here it is, im living it today.
And today, i dont think i deserve love.